Friday, July 17, 2009

Once Upon A Time

A funny little story by a guy named RangerFan89 on the official rangers bulletin boards.

"Once upon a time, the Rangers general manager was Neil Smith. Smith lead the Rangers to their first Stanley Cup in 54 years. But he was also considered their worst gm in history. Why? Because he traded away his young talent for older, past their prime veterans. It all started one day when Smith found a bag of "stuff" in his office. Smith became addicted, and with it game players like Wayne Gretzky, Theo Fleury, Bobby Holik, Eric Lindros, and Pavel Bure. The team was essentially ruined. As time went by the fans began to call for his head, and they eventually got it. Smith was let go. In comes Glenn Sather.

People had hopes for Glenn to turn the team around. Unfortunately for the Rangers, Glenn had found the bag Smith was using. He also began to sign players completely out of their prime. And then there was the draft. 2003 was a pretty deep draft, but good old Glenny thought he knew what he was doing. At the 12th pick overall, Sather drafted Hugh Jessiman who was going to be the next "star" for the New York Rangers. After Jessiman, Brent Seabrook, Zach Parise, Ryan Kessler, Ryan Getzlaf, Mike Richards, and Corey Perry were selected. But that was ok. Jessiman would be the savior of the team, according to Glenn.

As seasons ended and free agency began, Sather would pull out the bag, and go to work. "I think I'm going to sign both Scott Gomez and Chris Drury, and I'm going to give them rediculous amounts of money", he thought. "Lets sign Wade Redden to 6 million per and give him a no trade clause. I think Rosival also deserves to be overpaid as well." "Let's trade away a hard working top 4 defensmen in Tyutin for a lazy under-achiever in Zherdev. I'm sure he will prosper here in New York. And Sean Avery wants too much money. I don't care if he is the main reason this team has made it to the playoffs 2 years in a row. He can go to Dalas. I need that extra cap space for guys like Wade Redden."

And then one day the smoke cleared and he thought "What the hell am I doing?!" After losing to the Capitals in 7 games, Sather new he had to shake things up. But how? One day he met with Canadians GM Bob Gainey. "Hey wanna try some of this stuff?" "Yea thats good." "Now lets talk hockey. I'll give you Gomez and 2 average prospects for a younger Higgins, your #1 prospect, and 2 other prospects." "Sure, as long as you give me more stuff." And Sather ridded himself of Gomez's contract and signed Marian Gaborik. Then he met with Colorado's GM. "Hey wanna try some of this stuff?" " have any more?" "Yea, I'll give you a defensive prospect for your #3 overall prospect who is much younger and will probably be able to make the team in a year or two." "ok" "

1 comment:

  1. This poster has some flaws. First of all, "Glenn" Sather's first name is spelled G-L-E-N...only one N. Automatic lack of credibility when you can't even spell our GM's first name right.

    Second, of all those players mentioned as being bad signings by Smith, only Gretzky and Fleury were actually signed by Smith, and Lindros, Holik and Bure came during the Sather era. And were Fleury and Gretzky the problem? I don't think so. I think terrible defense and crap players like Valeri Kamensky were the downfall.

    The idea was good, make a funny story out of the Rangers transactions over the last 15 years. But the writing is bad, there are errors in facts of the story, and there is no ending to the "story".